The 5 Elements of a Decomposing HiveMind

The decomposing hivemind refers to a toxic group environment. The term HiveMind refers to any group collective. For example, it can be your work team, your family or your friend circle. The are the elements which contribute to a toxic hivemind. Hiveminds are love and connection gardens that need nurturing and work. Clean out those elements that are eating away at your hivemind by identifying the areas that could be damaging yours.

First look at the things that YOU can do better vs confronting others with their flaws. Model the behaviors that you wish to see.

5Elements of a Decomposing Hivemind

Element 1: Ineffective or Abusive Communication

  • Filtering out positive details about an experience
  • Polarized or black and white thinking
  • The delusions of mind reading
  • Over generalization of behaviors or thoughts
  • Personalization and taking fault in all the drama
  • Delusions of control
  • Delusion of fairness
  • Blaming behaviors
  • Non-verbalized expectations
  • Emotional blackmail
  • Emotional reasoning vs. Fact finding
  • Expectations of others to change
  • Global labeling
  • Dishonesty
  • Vague communication
  • The need to win
  • Martyr fallacy
  • “you” or attacking statements
  • Judgmental statements
  • Over-catastrophizing statements
  • Tactless statements
  • Demands
  • Minimizing and devaluing the hive
  • Disrespect
  • Use intimidation
  • Use contempt
  • Use defensiveness
  • Use stonewalling
  • Use criticism
  • Do not manage conflict well
  • Do not repair during or after conflict
  • Do not have clear and direct communication
  • Do not overcome gridlock

Element 2: Have Unhealthy Boundaries

  • Over enmeshment or smothering
  • Victimhood or martyrdom
  • Excessive detachment and emotional unavailability
  • Lack of privacy or autonomy
  • Dependency
decomposing hivemind

Element 3: Culture of Disconnection

Element 4: Lack of Trust and Transparency

  • Actively build negative hive culture and minimal deposits in the trust bank
  • Inconsistent with accountability and follow through
  • No Establishment of safe spaces for communication
  • Use harmful and hurtful candor or deception and lies
  • Unsupportive of individual and family goals and choices
  • Compromises instead of collaboration
“Everything on your resume is true, right?”

Element 5: Do Not Think Like a Team and Create Shared Meaning

  • Do not make and support intentional shared goals and values
  • Do not check in regularly about their hive’s goals
  • Do not often celebrate hive accomplishments
  • Strategic poly planning polycule and individual goals
  • Support life dreams
  • Mutual exploration
  • Are not open to the hive influence
  • Do not often participate in hive connecting activities
  • Self-focused goals
  • Compromise and build resentment
  • Do not have economic or hive responsibility partnerships